Well, in case you haven't noticed, all of the posts up to this point have been written by Jason. Needless to say, I seem to have lost all sense of time and any "free time" that I have, I am in such a haze that I don't think I would be able to complete an entire sentence. I have been reading the blog updates that Jason writes and will admit that so far, he has been pretty accurate. Quick summary of the first 3 1/2 days at home: dogs - could care less; feeding - going really well, he is a Corn after all and we plan our every move from one meal to the next; sleep - getting better with each passing day.
Of course, it hasn't been all roses but I didn't expect it to. The one thing that still surprises me is how I can literally just sit and stare at him for hours and hours. I still don't think the reality has hit that he is mine and that after all the months of "feeling" him inside of me has led to this. Even when he is screaming and giving me his full out, top of his lungs (which are getting stronger every day) cry, I still feel nothing but love for him. Last night was when this moment came clear for me. I had sent Jason to take a much deserved nap in the late afternoon/early evening and Chase was napping himself. He woke from his nap, ready to eat so we fed. It wasn't long after when he was convinced he needed to eat again. I knew better since it was simply that his stomach was a little grumbly and he just needed time to "process". Normally, when he gets fussy like that, Jason will take him and try to comfort him while I leave the room. He associates me with food (shocking!) and thinks when I hold him, food will follow. Well, dad was not available last night so he was stuck with me (or as he would probably tell you if he could), I teased him while he cried and pitched a fit. Ultimately, he cried himself to the point of exhaustion and fell asleep and stayed that way for the next 2 1/2 hours! Geez, funny that mom knows best (at least in this particular case). While it was hard to have him cry, even at the peak of his fit, I still loved him and I wasn't frustrated or upset by him, just by the fact that I had to let him suffer in order to help him. That was when I had one of my first "mom moments". That notion that even though it was hard for me to do, I had to sit by and let him "hurt". I was kinda hoping to hold off on that kind of moment for a few years, not a few days.
Last night Chase and I ventured out for our first walk around the neighborhood together. Dad was napping and mom needed a change of scenery so we got the car seat and stroller out and took a little stroll. I am still trying to build up my own energy level so we didn't go far, but it was nice to get out of the house for a little bit. We are going to run some more errands today while waiting for my brother, Matt, his wife and my nephew to arrive for a visit.
Chase slept like a champ last night, at least in my opinion. After taking a 3 1/2 hour nap early in the evening, he woke for a feeding. After feeding, I took a shower and went to bed while Jason took the night shift (remember he had just taken a 4 hour nap himself and was more rested at that point than I was). I took my shower and went to bed and actually got to sleep for 2 1/2 hours before Chase needed to be fed. He fed and fell back to sleep for another 3 hours before he needed to be fed again! He woke up a little more than 1 hour later for another feeding and slept for 2 hours. He has been down for a nap right now for over 1 1/2 hours. While I feel great this morning with those decent blocks of sleep, Jason is still a bit groggy. While I thought I would be the one who would suffer from the lack of sleep, I seem to be doing a bit better than daddy is at this point. May it continue in this way for all of us!
Well, who knows when I will be able to update again but that is a glimpse of parenting from my perspective. I hope that you are enjoying reading our blog. It is fun to go back and see how things have changed from the start and will be a cool thing for Chase to have as he gets older. For now, I want him to stay a little baby who is sweet and innocent and smiles at me (no, it isn't always gas!) when he hears me talk to him. Thanks to everyone who has sent, emails, gifts, cards and thoughts of well wishes. It means a lot to both Jason and I to have so many people in our lives who care about us.
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